很认真地谈过了。所有的结都打开了。我还以为我会哭，还带了很多tissue。哈哈哈哈
结果，我都没哭。；）
我由衷谢谢他，打从心底。：）
我知道你只是来拯救我的。谢谢你～ 一切的一切 ;')
It's time for me to keep away all the stuff which are related to you dy. Yeahh many times I said I will let go but then that guitar pick is still in my purse, that passport photo of yours is still lying in my ic holder, that birthday deco is hanging still on my wall no matter how many times it dropped, our photos and vids are still in my phones, those long long stressful msg that I've sent in the past one year are still kept in phone, safely and soundly. I wouldn't actually re-read or re-view, but I was so loath to clear them away, I wanted to just keep them. STUPID THIS TIME YOU HAVE TO KEEP AWAY DYYY. Urm, but I will leave the plane on my study table. Cuz it's my dream ey ;) anyway I don't always remember that I have a plane model. My table is always messy. It's like, OH YA HOR I ACTUALLY HAVE A PLANE WEIH! Hahaha
But yeah this time you made it clear enough and. YES YOU GIRLS WERE RIGHT. Perhaps I knew it all the way. It's just that I never want to accept it. But, yeah he cleared my doubts and untied all the knots dy. Although this is not really pleasant but, I do feel relieved. So light. Lost 5kgs. Just kidding. Hahah anyway I wanted it to be settled this way tho. Straight and clear.
Can't say that I am happy. But you know, there is really no any reasons for me to hold on anymore, no reasons for me to be stubborn anymore, no reasons for me to act insanely anymore, no more reasons for me to be sad of what I shouldn't have actually care. And hence, since then I will be happy after this. I am happy, it's just that all this while, I have a wound in my heart and I shield myself. Was so torn all these while. Trying to seek for any evidences and hopes that I still occupy a space in his heart. I thought we are having that special connections after all. Clearly that is not the case. They're only what I thought. Too tired. But, very quick. It would be really quick this time. Cuz my self-remediate skills are too damn pro. Developed and trained all by myself. I admire myself for this. Hahaha
But I do not hate him. I will never. He taught me a lot. For the goods and bads one. 他是个好人，只是他不爱爱他的我。hahahahaha how should I say this. I think this is our fate and it's just this much ;) I accept this. He actually saved me from Shaun. I seriously thank him for this. Couldn't be more grateful for that. That's why lo. I said I cannot hate him. Hahaha and I cannot love him too. My god it's really enough dy I know I did too much la. Crazily. Like I realized this out of a sudden after so long. Stupid? Pfft. Opps wait. Not saying that I'm regret ahh :p no regrets. I'm glad we've met :)
And I have to say thank you dearies. For the support and courages all this while. Specially thank hengzhisam for bringing me out from the darkest zone half a year ago. And also thoowenyie who listens to my random 有的没的. And if ngzhiqi is reading, hello babe I'm waiting for you at the other end come over fast! Thanks to both of you who always gimme cold water splash. Seriously thank ah no kidding hahaha. And of cuz, my dear jasmine who supports me all along, giving comforts and loves no matter what I do and say. Xiexienimen <3
这次，真的输了。没有很伤心。可是失落是有的。是我太执着了。该是时候放过自己了；）
没关系。很快会好起来的；）
对自己说声对不起，因为一直以来没有好好爱自己。
在未来的以后偶尔回想起的话，会是微笑；不再是皱眉。
为未来更好的自己而加油吧黄珂静！只为自己：）
亲爱的，你不必为了谁而改变。如果要成为更好的自己，请为了自己。真正爱你的人会一直爱你，无论怎样的你。
—几米
我听说你是太阳花呢！；）快点打起精神吧！你还不知道未来有多精彩呢！也许，你的超级无敌smart幽默成熟搞笑的王子在等着你！哈哈哈哈还王子咧真是～
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